YuinYin.com

Today will be a short post. I’m not feeling well today due to the side effects of chemotherapy and radiotherapy.

When I’m feeling better, I’ll update u guys. I need some rest now.

I hope I will still be able to make it for the Melaka trip. I’m looking forward to meet Desmond in Melaka. Hope can meet Yung too.

I feel good today. I finally saw that sweet smile on Yin Mei’s face. Few days ago, she looked like other very typical cancer patient. Moody, sad, and pale. Today she looked good! Happy face, there are some pinkish color back on her face. Waaahh it feels so good to cheer up other people. I guess this is my calling. To help other cancer patient to recover. Positive thinking, positive emotion can KILL CANCER!

Hmmm…from now on I should be on hardcore blogging about how to deal with cancer. I hope more or less I can help more people out there. Bcos i realise a lot of patient don’t understand about cancer and how to cope with it. See —> I set up a new category called “cancer & me”. Stay tune!

Yesterday only I find out that the onset of the side effects from chemotherapy depends on the type of drugs used, the dosage, and the targeted type of cells in the body.

For mine, I was given cisplatin. The side effect will only occur after a few hours during the same night or second morning. Cisplatin mainly cause nausea and severe vomiting. But this vomiting can be ceased by taking Emend. Emend is a potent antiemetic (antivomiting) drug. So far I did not have any discomfort due to vomiting, that’s why i’m still happy happy here can go redbox sing K. =P However Emend is very expensive. Each course, need intake of 3 capsule. 1st capsule 125mg need to be taken 1 hour before the chemotherapy starts. 2nd and 3rd capsules both 80mg need to be taken the following 2nd and 3rd day. I paid 100USD for this package of 3 capsules of emend. If you think this is expensive hor… see the price i found here. Emend cost about 260USD.

Because Emend is very expensive, i realise in the whole chemoday care ward… I’m the only patient taking it. Not to say I’m rich or what but I think I sure cannot tahan vomiting like that lor. I met one patient who was admitted to the hospital for 10 days due to unstoppable vomiting after her 1st first chemotherapy. 10 days~ O.o I can go lepak with liyi and Yvonne and do a lot of things together!

After chemotherapy yesterday, I started to feel uncomfotable beginning at night. Feel nausea and a bit dizzy. Very weird kind of feeling. It makes you don’t wanna do anything. Even sleep can’t relieve me from this weird weird feeling. So guys, if we go lepak on wednesday and thursday and I’m a bit inactive… so you know la. I’m trying to control myself and deal with the side effects. Thank you for your understanding and still lepak with me. Oh… tonite I wanted to give Yvonne a treat in La Risata. I hope I will have some appetite to eat. Italian food ler~ My favourite >_<.

Yesterday, a physics + add maths teacher who teach in smk usj4 was beside my bed. She has ovarian cancer stage 4 i think. She had all her uterus and ovaries removed (total hysterectomy). In the morning, I can see she was a very emotionally unstable. Then I spend time talking to her, comforting her. I told her cancer is nothing, it can’t kill us but will make us stronger. I know why she got sick. She was too worried about her students. SPM is coming soon. Dear any students from smk usj 4 who are reading my blog, please do go cheer her up. Ask your teacher not to worry about u guys k? Tell her you’ll do ur best in SPM and score A1 for physics and Add maths for her! She’s a really really nice and dedicated teacher.

She reminded me of Pn.Soh. Oh dear… I miss her so much. Pn.Soh was my form teacher for 2 years and also my Add maths teacher. She was the one who always encourage me to pursue medicine. She told me once that I don’t have to give drugs to my patients. My cheerfulness, my smile and laughter will heal them. Perhaps what she said is true. I am trying my best to influence other patient with my cheerfulness. I want them to be happy as well, to overcome cancer without fear but with full of hope. I am slowing seeding hope inside a few of the patients. Everytime we meet in SJMC, I can see how happy they are to see me. Because I always bring them the sunshine (hope), I always make them feel loved. I will continue loving other people as much as I can…. as long as I’m living here on earth.

TO MY DEAR YVONNE, THANK YOU FOR BEING MY PILLAR OF STRENGTH DURING MY MOST VULNERABLE STATE. BECAUSE OF YOU, I CONTINUE WALKING. I LOVE YOU.

Being trained to observe every human being from head to toe in detail, hehe… I couldn’t stop myself from noticing “things” in people all the time. Few weeks back then, I went out for a gathering. I couldn’t help myself but to notice my friend’s girlfriend has gingivitis. Everytime she smiles, her gums looks very swollen and red. I bet when she has bad breath too. Uuurrrggghhh bad kisser! Until today, I still wonder if I should tell my friend about it so that his girlfriend can get early treatment from the dentist to prevent caries. *Trapped in the sense of guilt. Should I tell or don’t tell? If I tell, then will be embarrassing for her. If don’t tell… then she will get caries and lose her teeth!

Not only in such situation. Like I notice some people have anemia by looking at the color of their lips, finger nails and palms. I notice some people who have GIT disorder by observing what they eat and the amount of food they eat. =D Hahaha I’m getting pretty good at this at observing people…. I bet my therapy teacher should be very happy to hear this. Meanwhile, April say she will never smile directly at me so that I can’t look at her gums and she will put on nail polish as long as she is with me so that I can’t look at her nails either lol.

Same goes to… when you see your friend, (female) digging her nose la… errhh not the first time doing it. She dug her nose several times in public liao. And you notice this… and also notice the reaction of public to her habit. What should you do as a friend? Tell her or just keep quiet? You know as a friend you should remind her about it but then… if you tell hor, she might not like it and treat you like her enemy. If choose not to tell… is also hmm… Aiyo susah wan to be a human being la. What will u guys do la in such situation?

Oh updates on me today. Regretted going so early for radiotherapy la. Being surrounded by ah ma and ah pek and ngam ngam give them A LOT of time and opportunity to question me and pity me. Haih… Cancer don’t choose the victim wan la… I know I’m just overly depressed when in Kursk that’s why ended up in SJMC cancer and radiosurgery centre lor! What’s there to be pity about la? Though I know I’m not eligible to buy any medical & healthcare insurance liao… but still… does it matter? Going through all this will only make me stronger and a better doctor in future. What don’t kill you makes you stronger ma!~

Ceh I will not waste my time entertaining these ah sam and ah pek for the sake of torturing me~. Tsk tsk… the more you talk to them, the more depressing it is. They’ll remind you how wasted is your life. -_-” but the truth is… I am truly happy now. Really HAPPY! I gained much more than I lost you know.

True friends. Love. Comfort. Confident. Support.

What’s more important than these eh? Life is very simple. Don’t make it so complicated.

See bear bear so happy ^^.

Today is Monday. 6th radiotherapy.
Current mood: Happy, joyful, cheerful
Current appetite: want to eat noodles la~
Current motto in life: LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST!~ I will live in order to eat penang asam laksa, nasi lemak ehehe.

I feel very happy today. Had a good sleep. I did something good today. I managed to lift up the spirit of other cancer patient with my extreme cheerful aura… ngek ngek ngek. So the KEY for healing and recovery is H-A-P-P-Y-N-E-S-S mah.

Good mood can reduce side effect of chemotherapy and radiotherapy. At least when I’m feeling happy, my nausea will decrease and my appetite will be good. I eat quite little recently. Feed mainly on fruit juices and sweet potatoes. Though I eat so little, I’m still very energetic and hyperactive!~ SO KEEP ME HAPPY! ^^

Oh I seriously think go Redbox sing K will help a bit. Sing out loud with all your heart and then eventually you will feel good. As if all the burdens are let out. Hehe, lately I become a frequent customer to Redbox also. And best go with mates who can sing and can gila with you. [P/S: Huimin, I wanna... wanna go sing K with you~]

And hey…. why nobody bid for the teddy bear earrings wan? Aiya… what happen to all my kawan? For charity wei~ do your part la. Cis… remembering those days I sent you monalisa postcard all the way from the Lourve, Paris? Apalar, at least if u dun want to buy for me then buy for your gf, mother, sister, etc etc.

Oh got another new earrings, the butterfly one.

CLICK HERE TO BID for the butterfly earrings

CLICK HERE TO BID for the teddy bear earrings

Eh, teddy bear auction will end soon ler. Faster place your bid!