Yesterday only I find out that the onset of the side effects from chemotherapy depends on the type of drugs used, the dosage, and the targeted type of cells in the body.

For mine, I was given cisplatin. The side effect will only occur after a few hours during the same night or second morning. Cisplatin mainly cause nausea and severe vomiting. But this vomiting can be ceased by taking Emend. Emend is a potent antiemetic (antivomiting) drug. So far I did not have any discomfort due to vomiting, that’s why i’m still happy happy here can go redbox sing K. =P However Emend is very expensive. Each course, need intake of 3 capsule. 1st capsule 125mg need to be taken 1 hour before the chemotherapy starts. 2nd and 3rd capsules both 80mg need to be taken the following 2nd and 3rd day. I paid 100USD for this package of 3 capsules of emend. If you think this is expensive hor… see the price i found here. Emend cost about 260USD.

Because Emend is very expensive, i realise in the whole chemoday care ward… I’m the only patient taking it. Not to say I’m rich or what but I think I sure cannot tahan vomiting like that lor. I met one patient who was admitted to the hospital for 10 days due to unstoppable vomiting after her 1st first chemotherapy. 10 days~ O.o I can go lepak with liyi and Yvonne and do a lot of things together!

After chemotherapy yesterday, I started to feel uncomfotable beginning at night. Feel nausea and a bit dizzy. Very weird kind of feeling. It makes you don’t wanna do anything. Even sleep can’t relieve me from this weird weird feeling. So guys, if we go lepak on wednesday and thursday and I’m a bit inactive… so you know la. I’m trying to control myself and deal with the side effects. Thank you for your understanding and still lepak with me. Oh… tonite I wanted to give Yvonne a treat in La Risata. I hope I will have some appetite to eat. Italian food ler~ My favourite >_<.

Yesterday, a physics + add maths teacher who teach in smk usj4 was beside my bed. She has ovarian cancer stage 4 i think. She had all her uterus and ovaries removed (total hysterectomy). In the morning, I can see she was a very emotionally unstable. Then I spend time talking to her, comforting her. I told her cancer is nothing, it can’t kill us but will make us stronger. I know why she got sick. She was too worried about her students. SPM is coming soon. Dear any students from smk usj 4 who are reading my blog, please do go cheer her up. Ask your teacher not to worry about u guys k? Tell her you’ll do ur best in SPM and score A1 for physics and Add maths for her! She’s a really really nice and dedicated teacher.

She reminded me of Pn.Soh. Oh dear… I miss her so much. Pn.Soh was my form teacher for 2 years and also my Add maths teacher. She was the one who always encourage me to pursue medicine. She told me once that I don’t have to give drugs to my patients. My cheerfulness, my smile and laughter will heal them. Perhaps what she said is true. I am trying my best to influence other patient with my cheerfulness. I want them to be happy as well, to overcome cancer without fear but with full of hope. I am slowing seeding hope inside a few of the patients. Everytime we meet in SJMC, I can see how happy they are to see me. Because I always bring them the sunshine (hope), I always make them feel loved. I will continue loving other people as much as I can…. as long as I’m living here on earth.

TO MY DEAR YVONNE, THANK YOU FOR BEING MY PILLAR OF STRENGTH DURING MY MOST VULNERABLE STATE. BECAUSE OF YOU, I CONTINUE WALKING. I LOVE YOU.